It’s December! How crazy is that? If you’re reading this, congrats on surviving 2017. It was a tumultuous year full of plenty of highs and lows. I know I visited this subject plenty of times, but I just want to repeat how important it is to trust God’s (the universe, or whatever higher power you choose to believe in) timing. Honestly, we will never truly understand why events conspire when they do, but the timing of life’s moments have a specific purpose.
If you had asked me 5 years ago where I saw myself, I would have told you, “I want to at least be a junior TV producer, living on either the west or east coast, married to my dream man and basically slaying at life.” Obviously not the case right now, but maturing a little bit has taught me there are a rhyme and reason for each season of our life.
Being an extrovert, I make friends pretty easy. As I continue to mature and age, I began really evaluating my inner circle. Again a huge reason why I don’t really interact with Facebook anymore. It’s such a great social connecting device, but for me, it just became so one-dimensional. But as much I like interacting with people and befriending people I connect with, I really began to appreciate the family I built outside of my family. Late night philosophical talks, deep hearty laughter, tears of emotional growth > fake friends.
Like my support system/friends, I analyzed where I was at with my career. Again, I honestly felt like I got “my shot” this year potentially with BroadwayHD whom I adore and love. But I know in my heart, I went through that application process for a specific purpose and it instilled this uplifting faith that I am worthy. My work ethic, my brand can fit into this industry. Not only that but I learned I can’t keep playing the comparison game with everyone else’s career. Everyone has their own journey we have to respect. My evolution and place in my career will take fold, I just have to trust that God knows what he’s doing.
I guess why I got so defensive about my love life in my last post is because I just got to the point where I’m tired of people playing God with my life. I know I’m not going to meet the love of my life grinding on strangers in a noisy club. Swiping right on someone I barely know on some app. Kudos to all the people who found actual love on dating sites/app but it’s not for me. I feel a little bummed that my generation has become a cleaner more contemporary version of hippies promoting hook up culture. I’m not some stuck up prude, but the number of times I’ve seen pure and extraordinary people get completely crushed because were taken advantage of makes me a little more conscientious and careful when it comes to my own heart. Like I said timing is something not really in our control. We can take action all we want, and I encourage it… but ultimately we have to place faith in God’s timeline.
It’s amazing how ordinary this year seemed, but for my mental health, my character, my spirit… I feel like I took steps I haven’t in the past. Really focusing on centering myself in positivity and not drown in societal pressure. Reconnecting my heart with someone so genuine, human, and honest rather than someone who silently manipulated people. Being concerned with matters of the heart, it’s not just about your heart’s physical condition but making sure you’re not enduring harm you shouldn’t be.
2018 I am sending positive vibes that it will be a year of challenging myself to mature, navigate adulting in a thoughtful and happy way, and just a year to enjoy life. Manifest those dreams people. You got me your petite angel in your corner.
Upwards and onwards,